Despair.
Not a good place to be.
I found this forgotten image among my files. And at least to my surprised mind (when I opened the file), the red-and-black attempts to make the thing look and feel violently and jarringly unhappy actually worked. I think I know why I was in such a crappy mood, but I still don't remember much about making the image.
All I can say is, it's not a good place to be, and I have been there too often.
It is also hard for people who haven't been there to understand:
The difficult task is not to judge, but to help. Not to condemn, but to reach out. ... And not the least, to remind ... there is Light that is apart from the darkness, which does not judge, does not condemn, does not patronize and lecture, and in which mistakes are forgiven, wounds are healed, and once-forgotten joy can be rediscovered and understood again.
rei (at) art.net
or
rei (at) mit.edu