Cosmic Bongout

Note: The following document is provided for informational purposes only. It is meant to illustrate the depravity of the practitioners of the ritual described therein. Its distribution is not a statement by its distributors that they support or condone the activities described therein. The distributors are well aware that anyone who uses or has ever used drugs of any kind, including alcohol, should be immediately executed for their sins against God and the State. This is also true of those who have advocated the use of drugs or alcohol; for example, a particularly unrelenting and popular pusher is the Pope. "Blood of the Christ," indeed. Somebody ought to invade Vatican City and arrest that man.

The latest unofficial rule supplement for Cosmic Wimpout

COSMIC BONGOUT

"The game of choice for substance abusers."

Necessary equipment:

One (1) set of cosmic wimpout dice.
Sufficient quantities of your favorite controlled substance.
Paraphenalia necessary to partake of your favorite controlled substance.

History:

Originally, this supplementary set of rules was developed for use with Marijuana and a water pipe (bong). However, as time passed, other drugs became popular and the rules still seemed to apply. However, the name is considered a "catchy phrase" and has been retained, irrespective of the involved substances.

Notes on substances of choice:

Some substances are better than others for use with this game. The more appealing substances are those with a high LD50 [for obvious reasons]. Another important consideration is speed of onset of effect. Too long an onset time seems to make the game pointless. An ideal onset time is the time until just after your next turn. Thus, LSD is a bad choice. The intensity of effect is also important. The game will dissolve if the drug is too intense. A good marker is whether you can figure out how to take your next turn -- or whether you can even remember that you are playing a game. This consideration pretty much rules out DMT. The following substances are recommended: marijuana, alcohol, N2O or ether (WARNING: *low* LD50), cocaine, and dried banana peels. In addition, it is very strongly recommended that all players be using the same drug.

Object:

The object of the game is to partake of as much of your chosen substance as possible, within the bounds of sanity and safety.

Preparation:

Before adding the following rules, insure that the standard rules are understood and agreed upon. Also, insure that the ambiguities in the standard rules have been ironed out, or at least some method of deciding outcomes of ambiguous situations is understood -- later in the game this sort of thing might be more difficult.

Have the controlled substance prepared in such a way as to minimize the time delay involved in introducing it to your brain when you earn the opportunity to partake. For example, if you are using joints, have them rolled before the game starts.

Choose values for the variables o and n found in the rules below. For a game using marijuana with a bong, suggested values are 500 and 100 respectively.

Rules:

Players must take every "hit"* they are entitled to, but may not take more until the after the end of the game. This is the most important rule.
Players must finish their entitled hits before their next turn.
Players may not miss turns.
For every n points a player accumulates, that player is entitled to one hit. A player is only entitled to a hit the first time that multiple of n is reached (0 is not a multiple of n in this context). For example, when Jane first reaches n points, she takes a hit. If on her subsequent turn she were to lose 2 points and then gain them back later, she would not be eligible for another hit for again reaching n.
o is the `winning total' as defined by the standard rules. A player is entitled to a hit for reaching o. This hit is in addition to any granted by other rules. For example, if o is a multiple of n, a player takes two hits upon reaching o.
When a player wins the game (by the standard rules), that player is entitled to an additional hit for winning.
Any player who causes damage to the substance or surrounding environment loses n points, subject to the vote of the other players. For example, if Dick laughs while taking a bong hit and blows water through the bowl, he loses n points. Negative total scores are allowed. In the event of truly monumental damage, the other players may vote to increase the penalty to a maximum of 3n points. (E.g.: if Dick were to tip over the bong and spill it on the carpet, he would likely be assessed a very heavy penalty). This rule does not apply to people who do damage to themselves (e.g.: Dick would not be assessed a penalty for setting himself on fire unless he caused smoke damage to those around him).
Any player who dies in the course of play due to an overdose of the involved drug automatically loses. Any player who dies in the course of play for other reasons automatically wins, but need not take any more earned hits.
Challenges: when a situation arises in which another player's roll is worth over 50 points (i.e.: not less than 55) and that player may either stop rolling or continue, then you may challenge that player in either of two ways:
1. If the player rolls and does not wimp out (on that role), the player is entitled to a hit. If the player wimps out, you are entitled to a hit.
2. If the player rolls and wimps out (on that role), the player is entitled to a hit. If the player does not wimp out, then you are entitled to a hit.
The player may refuse any challenge by not rolling. A player may be challenged by at most one person per role.

Optional Rules:

Any player who train wrecks on a turn which would have been worth more than n points is entitled to a hit.
Any player who rolls a freight train (5 the same) is entitled to an additional hit, unless it is also a supernova (just too many points...). This applies regardless of whether the player wimps out later in the turn. For example, if n is 100 and Spot rolls a freight train of 5s, he will be entitled to one hit for the freight train (regardless of later success) and at least 5 more hits if he doesn't subsequently wimp out. Of course, you might lose Spot at this point. Recall, however, that a freight train of sixes doesn't confer any additional points. So, if Spot were to roll a freight train of sixes he would be entitled to only two hits (one for winning, one for the freight train).

* Definition of hit: One hit is one instance of imbibing the relevant substance. This may mean one shot of whisky, one inhalation from a bong, or whatever else the players may want it to mean. In general, it is better that the actual amount of a hit not be too defined. That allows very large hits to be taken at the beginning, and very small toward the end.

Legalities: The authors of this document are in no way associated with C3 Inc (the producers of Cosmic Wimpout), nor do we know whether C3 would approve of this document. Cosmic Wimpout is a registered trademark of C3 Inc. For a free subscription to the Cosmic Wimpout Occasional News write:

Cosmic Wimpout, P.O. Box 3199, Greenfield, MA 01302

It's more than an experience, it's a game!

From: gerber@solbourne.com (Andrew Gerber)
Subject: Re: Cosmic Wimpout rules supplement

"The November Contest", or "The Bong Game" has been played on various East Campus and Senior House floors for over 10 years now. Basically, every night in November at Midnight (starting the night of Haloween) a similar game has been played with ordinary dice.

Elaborate statistics are tallied (this being MIT) and monthly ranking are posted; over the last couple of years the month winner has won with ~700 hits on the month.

The rules are simple; roll five dice.

You can continue rolling as long as some dice in your last roll score. If all 5 dice score you must pick them up and roll again. Your score accrues from roll to roll.

Three of a kind is 100 * the die (except for 3 1's, which is 1000); single 5's are 50 and single 1's are 100). 5 ones is 5000. Games are played to 5000 points, with a hit every 1000 points.

The first person to go over 5000 "win", but then everyone gets one last roll to attempt a "come from behind". So in most games, everyone gets up near 4950, and waits until they get a huge roll or until someone goes out, and attempts to beat their roll. A normal win is worth 2 extra hits, a come from behind is worth 5.

Documents in hand of some MIT student attest to the fact that this game has been played since 1978. It originated on 4th West East Campus; moved to 5th West East Campus in Nov 1984 (my first year on the hall) and remained there through November 1988. In the past year, with the terminal dullness of 5W, it moved between 5E and somewhere in Senior House.

andy